Our mental and emotional reactive patterns are incredibly deep and persistent. We each carry around with us a vast array of habitual ways of seeing things, which determines how we act in various situations.
For instance, one of the most telling situations that will expose our degree of autonomy and individuation is that of the family gathering. Here are some questions to ponder when anticipating a family get together. When I am with my family:
- How does my behavior change?
- What roles do I shift into/avoid?
- Is there anyone I protect/criticize?
- What am I watching for/cautious of?
To answer these questions, see if you can maintain Awakened Attention to catch your impulses, prior to action. Notice how you are feeling in relation to each member of your family. If you are awake you may want to go counter to your impulses. If you are really up for discomfort, try on a completely foreign role.
(Read with your tongue in your cheek)
As for me, I just stay away from my family. They bring out the worst in me and I am way to busy to deal with all of the ways they make me crazy. If they are all willing to change and see things as I do, maybe then we can get along. Until then, I just stay in my own private world. Family shmamily.
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